The Brothers Strause (oh, get them!), debut directors, make sure to include all the things you expect from an Alien film: Xenomorph presses head close to frightened lady baby creature bursts out of chest physically robust woman lugs around infant. Now here is Alien vs Predator: Ultimatum. The film does, of course, also feature a purebred Predator, but, as the minutes crawl along, it fast becomes clear that the real stars of the show are the shiny black lizard-things. One for Sweeney Todd one for Silent Hill one for Falling Skies and then one for Star Wars.

Before long, Brad the rebel, Cindy the minx and Biff the bully are fleeing an army of recently hatched Aliens. The crossbreed - spawned, apparently, in some gloomy corner of AVP 1 - takes over a Predator spacecraft and causes it to hurtle towards a town entirely populated by people off the telly. Pools are muddied further by the introduction of a beast that combines features of both belligerent species. If you extracted the action sequences and laid some scratchy Polish jazz over them, you could peddle the result as an avant-garde art experiment. Well, something unpleasant is certainly afoot in the back woods of Colorado, but the camerawork is so murky and the editing so haphazard that the precise nature of the conflict remains in doubt. That title doesn't promise much, but it does, at least, hold out the possibility of a punch-up between several fanged Xenomorphs and at least one intergalactic trophy hunter. Starring Reiko Aylesworth, Steven Pasquale, John Ortiz, Shareeka Epps, Johnny Lewis, Robert Joy 16 cert, gen release, 86 min * What's going on? Harry Secombe vs The Honey Monster? Princess Grace vs Tank Girl? If you thought the first round of this celebrity death match was carried out in sepulchral gloom, then you're in for a rude shock, writes Donald Clarke.ĭirected by the Brothers Strause.

Aliens vs predator song